"Mommy not every Black Men Ain't Sh**t. Big Bird told me we are individuals so it's only your man." She popped me dead in my smart mouth and sent me to my room. Big Bird and me running my mouth always got me in trouble.
"Wait till them bastards have you crying let's see if you'll say that later on in life."She screamed and then she popped me in the mouth for cursing.
It was a time when we called Black men Kings, Prince, and Warriors. We couldn't stand to hear someone to degrade his manhood and beat down his integrity. As his Queen, the woman that sat by his side we refuse to make him feel less than a man. We refused to rip his name or spirit apart. Now it has become a habit. It is almost as if we are programming our girls and vice versa. It is as if we are branding every black man as a low-life. It is conditioning our daughters to despise every man they encounter on the notion he ain't sh**t.
I guess even as a little girl I understood that not every brother is cut from the same cloth. I look at each man as an individual and not as a group of men. Sometimes we as women prepared for the man who enters our lives to treat us like dirt so the theory rears it head that he's just like the other men we've dated without giving the new guy a chance. We expect him to cheat because a lot our mothers instilled in us that "All Black Men Ain't Sh**T" mentality. Maybe it's was my mommy's way of protecting me from some of the pain I faced.
Not every black man we encounter will cheat, misuse,abuse,leave you and abandon you. I know many of great men who are wonderful boyfriends, husbands and all around great men. The theory isn't fair that we bundle all them in the category of not being Sh**t. That kills me because we have some other men who fit in the "ain't sh**t category from other ethnicities. Black men can and have made great boyfriends and husbands.
Have I been hurt by a black man? Yes. Has tears been shed because of him? Yes. The entire race of black men didn't bring tears to my eyes or hurt my heart. In fact some wonderful man was there to wipe them away. The point is if one brother hurts you it's unfair to put it on every black man's shoulders to carry the burden of the next man.
I'm not arguing that their isn't some Black men who haven't earned the title or don't have sh**ty ways that goes without saying. I know some men who can go right in a pile of it and fit perfectly. Yet, I also know some men who are honorable ,respectable and all about doing and treating their women and families good. Nothing comes above them but their higher power.
I hope that we can stop instilling in our daughters that all Black Men are inadequate to love, they are less than nothing. We have to find a way to change our words when it comes to our men. Some of those men when we use those word we speak of our sons, our nephews, our Daddies and Grandaddies.Just think about it when you utter those words, "All Black Men Ain't Shit."
© 2011 Tamyara Brown- Tamluvstowrite